Out of Office Message 1
I will be out of office from 29.08.2011 to 02.09.2011. Please get in touch with xyz incase of anything urgent.
Me (when I really care about keeping the job)
Out of Office Message 2
I will be out of office because I’ve decided to take this late holiday that I deserve. In the time period that I’m enjoying the sun, your emails will be deleted and I will come back to a clutter free inbox on 05.09.2011. Do not bother getting in touch with anyone else in my absence as they will probably mess up the work and I’ll have to do double work when I am back. 5 days won’t really change anything. Just wait.
If you cannot wait and you can manage to complete this work without my intervention, it would be brilliant. That just makes me wonder why you mailed me in the first place anyway.
Permanent Out of Office
If Out of Office Message 2 gets me fired, I’ll probably have more time to travel anyway.